How much does trading affect your Career/Relationship?

And how did you manage to decrease any unwanted effects if there's any ?

Please Admin split does from trading I was typing fast

I think that will depend on the phase the trader is.

If you are learning it will affect your days very dramatically. But after you are professional and the money starts flowing even your girlfriend/wife will want you to get up from bed and trade

First, let me laugh for your avatar minions, papoy !

i don't care relationship with anybody, everyday i'm just focus on chart.
control my psychology and think clearly.

and when market close,
I usually watch a movie, or studying astronomy, it's also an interesting part of my life.
I also often visit the site nasa, so many new planets have been discovered and are still a mystery. and I was interested to learn it, as well as forex every day is always a mystery, and I'm interested

I live alone, and I'm not interested in spending time having fun with friends or relatives

too many mysteries in outer space, and I should know!

do you think I'm crazy?
yes, you're right
i'm enjoy my life

My gf wants me out of the market even though I win

I don't think you're crazy at all in fact I'm surrounded by people who are exactly like you but instead of studying astronomy they study surgery and internal medicine oh, one more thing. .They do that 24/7 as they don't trade

That's great.

I think trading can become a vice like any other bad habit when is not taken with moderation. Even good things like going to the gym, church, working pro bono, practicing some hobbie will harm the strongest relationship if they are taking excesive amount of time.

Actually she's worried that trading may affect my career. And yeah you're absolutely right.

Horuxito......I agree with you that anything that takes a big portion(obsessively) of your time can harm your relationship.....but I definitely do not agree that trading is a "bad habit". Trading is not gambling.....witch is considered a bad habit....but even gambling for the pros it is not a bad habit....they make there living of that.
"Successful" Trading takes a lot of your time and from what I have seen in order to succeed in trading you have to REALLY dedicate yourself to it.....like any other profession.....Yes my wife sometimes complains....but you can't have everything in life...
To get to a level that you can trade whenever you feel comfortable, part time, and very important be successful at it part time.....you have put your time in it......
To be a brain surgeon you have to pay your dues....so you have to do in trading...there is no shortcuts.... so whoever you are with has to understand ..."this is what I do" .....and I would not change it for the world....

cristiano my friend, if you do not balance things yes it might affect your career.....but if you allocate a certain time on everything and you are discipline to stick to the schedule then there should not be a problem....
If you have the passion for trading, eventually it will take whatever free time you will have, most likely, if you are just doing it for the money.....then.....do not spend to much time in trading.....cause it will be a long ride...cause it is a long journey......my 2cents....

so I think I have to sit down and write a schedule to follow ... Will see about that

It has destroyed both. And very slowly over 15 yrs. Wouldnt have if I stuck to fundamental analysis of equities which I could do very well in 2-3 hrs a week.Then I added in technicals to the fundies ,made it maybe 5-6 hrs a week. But to use pure technical analysis as in forex, there is never enough time as there is never a closed market.

I also think that Forex trading gives shy people an excuse not to go out and push their envelope of comfort a little as is healthy to do. So be careful, you may turn into a great trader and find at age 50 or even older that you have no friends and no girlfriend or wife or....just as bad.............only other traders just like yourself for friends!!! And guys, if you think trading is interesting now, wait 10 more years when you are so messed up that every conversation you hear that is not about trading or financial markets seems boring to you. Your as good as dead, at that point. You look at the glamour of "The market wizards" and they seem so friendly and content, but do you really know what they do on weekends. I bet 80% of them are studying charts.And for many of them,... Getting laid? Whats that?

And I wouldnt be so eager to buy Ed S.'s commentary about a balanced life, and all that zen and meditation stuff. Its easier said than done. More likely is the Paul Tudor Jones model where the guy is up at 3am so he can trade whatever, and i MEAN whatever is trading in Japan. You want that life? 10 yrs ago I might have said yes. But now being 50 and single, you couldnt pay me enough.....and I can trade pre-tty good! Anyone who would like to comment on what I said are welcome to PM me.

I can relate to this post very much. I wish I couldn't, in fact, but I cannot deny the facts.

I am only 27 years old, but I've been pursuing trading for years (and other money-making crap for even longer... probably around since I was a teenager). I'm still not seeing the success I've always wanted, and I've done some serious soul-searching and you may have hit the nail on the head here. I am by no means a nerd or someone that doesn't have friends or whatever, but over the years I have become so consumed with trading, thinking that it would help expedite my learning curve, but the reality is that it has done nothing but provide an easy excuse to isolate yourself from the world. I was in a relationship for seven years, basically dating my high school sweetheart (except we met freshman year of college), moved in with her and everything, thought she was "the one", but then I made a series of wreckless choices that, looking back, had a very negative impact on my life... and I can say now that my perspective was distorted because I thought trading would be my "holy grail" and everything would just work itself out. I had the passion, the knowledge, the system, and everything... everything except the discipline. And by this point, it's probably needless to say, but things didn't work out, and my gf pulled the impossible and woke up one day and left me. She was the love of my life and I let her go simply because of my arrogance, stupidity, stubbornness, and inability to accept the hard truth, whatever it may be. It was more complicated than that actually, bc she did a number of things to hurt me too, but I continue to put a majority of the blame on myself, and my life (nor trading) has not been the same since then.

You see, I am extremely passionate about trading and although I'm not where I want to be yet, I know I will get there soon... I have an awesome technical system that works great, but I lack the discipline to follow it, and that is ultimately why I am not seeing the success I'd like yet. But in my opinion, trading is about so much more than that. It's a reflection of your current state of mind, of all the decisions you have made in the past, and the way you live your life. For me, discipline does not just apply to my trading, but to every aspect of my life. I lack the discipline in most areas of my life, and I certainly am not proud of that... which is why it's a worthy goal to try to change that and other related problems. Because if you can not be successful in your everyday life, how are you going to be successful as a trader?

I have not exactly lived a stable, healthy, or proactive lifestyle the last few years during my pursuit of trading, and honestly, that is probably the reason for my ultimate failure... But if you were to ask me one simple question... "is it worth it?" I think I would have to say no. It's not. When I started trading, I basically thought anything was worth the price of success. But I have had to face myself and the hard reality of the world since then, and I can tell you now without a shadow of a doubt that it's NOT worth all the pain and suffering I've had to go through. And even though I'm not where I'd like to be just yet, I am finally beginning to understand (and more importantly, live accordingly) to the fact that money is not everything. When you begin to accept this as I am doing now, I believe and am desperately hoping that everything else will start to fall into place, including the money.

But to the title of this thread and the point of Silat's message above, my answer would be that trading and ultimately my pursuit of success has affected my career and relationships dramatically. It's a tough field, if not the toughest, and you need to be fully aware of what you're up against before you ever get started. I've had to learn the hard way, and I would do everything differently if I could. Unfortunately, now I have to own up to my mistakes and start all over again and I know this will make me stronger in the end, as a trader and an individual, but I hold a lot of regrets and even if I were as successful as I'd like to be right now, it wouldn't be worth the cost of losing the people and things that you care about most.

And while I can only speak for myself, I know this message will reach out and apply to many people... because such is the nature of trading. It's a brutal game we all play, and it's easy to think that we're just playing it with ourselves, but trading affects the lives of everyone around us and the real game we are playing is one of self-growth and understanding. I believe that your success as a trader is directly proportional to the way you "think" about things and your approach to life, and for that reason I believe the more you grow as a trader, the more you grow and mature as a person. They are interrelated and the newbie trader usually doesn't understand this fact or simply overlooks it.

With that said, success is always there staring at you right around the corner, and that is a part of the temptation or lure of trading, but before you can get there, you have to understand what it means to be truly successful... And I can assure you that it is NOT about your level of intellect, but rather, everything else. And if you dismiss this fact as I have done in the past, then it makes sense that you're gonna be in for a long, hard, and nasty bumpy ride.

I think it is up to you how you deal with others after making money from forex .

I understand and agree with you, but your oversimplification and generalization proves that you're missing the point of this thread.

I'll bet Silat will agree with me, the reason I wrote all that and basically shared my life story is because that's exactly what trading is: it's a journey of learning, self growth, progression, and maturity. And to anyone who thinks those characteristics only apply in the trading world, then you are sadly mistaken and are probably swimming in waters that are too deep.

My point is that everyone has their own story to share and they almost all begin in the same way with a struggle of some kind. And it's how you overcome that struggle that determines your level of success or failure.

Success is achieved from within, and it's as simple as that.

Trading is my life.

Smash, applaud yourself for at least admitting it was mostly your fault. That will allow you to think clearer than most on future strategies and plans. For me, I assumed that once I became a successful trader, it would be like becoming a rock star. People at work would all be begging me for tips and information, I would be helping the struggling single moms and divorcees raising kids alone to make extra money. But then I realized, if you dont make enough, to blow peoples mind, like having that jelly apple red farrari in your garage, a 2 million dollar home and a jet setting lifestyle, even if you tell people you dont work and just stay home in your pajamas and trade....people will look at you and politely go "thats cool." I was once in my best year sitting in the barber chair, my hairstylist working on my haircut and she asked me what I do, and when I told her I trade stocks and foreign currencies, her first remark....like 80% of the people you tell is amazingly..."Isn't that very risky!!!!" I mean WTF! If you dont have as I said that jelly apple red Ferrari sitting outside to say..."so do "you" have a car like this? this is trading money." Nobody gives a damn or even has an interest. In fact I once was so frustrated at how I couldnt meet a single woman who could share my passion, I took along a book full of colorful trading charts on a first date and asked her....could you tell me where these bars are heading next, because if you can you can get very rich. Its really like watching art unfold."(she was an interior decorator!) Would you believe she looked at it for 3 or 4 minutes and never said a word about it again all thru our first date, next date and third and last date.And she was out of work! It blows me away. My own father..after telling him I made 16% on my acct in one week, said to me..."In the long run your just wasting your time.Why dont you get a real job, son?" Im 54 yrs old. He never looked at a chart in his life. This does not compute.

And believe it or not....how they say we live up to our parents expectations,right?.....that was my last winning year!!! It is such an isolating, lonely life, I know know why there are so many people giving seminars on it. They wou;ldnt have anyone else to talk to about this. Yet me..when I was a kid, if you told me you developed a system to beat the horses or win at the casinos, id be listening to you all day long! Most people cannot imagine very much further than where they are and I think those that can want you to fail so they dont look bad. But rock star status? Who besides guys like us know who Ed Seykota is or Paul Tudor Jones? Who is that trader who made so much he bought the Boston Red Sox? Was that Paul? Anyway, I bet 80% of the sox fans have no idea how he made that money to pay 600m for a baseball team!!! Trading will never be in. Not like it was in the 90's internet bubble.

And then my friend, as both of those guys have said.......sooner or later every system fails. Can you live with starting from scratch even after you spent 7-10 yrs learning how to make 1 or 2 or even 5 million dollars? And now, Im seeing something few are as well....the brokers, even the ones who dont hold your money, will hit your stops sooner or later if they get within 10-15 pips of the stop. Not always. But one of thre mm's does a favor and lifts the offer 5 min before closing 15 pips when nobody is buying or selling anyway and bam, 40 stops get hit, and 5 accounts get closed. So now, I am seeing that holding overnight is the most prudent way to avoid the spread munchkin, but you leave yourself open to games in the first 30 min and last 30 min of trading that Im sure have caused some people to commit suicide or at least destroy their life savings. So yes, Ive been a winning trader. But show me a guy who from the retail side using a retail broker like I do like FXCM, makes a living year after year with any method? Thats another factor you must consider too. Personally I wish i stayed with stocks. The people running forex here make those guys in equities look like boy scouts.

That really contributed so much to this thread. -)

Maybe.But ....Some of us will be constantly looked at as odd, others like me will always have family members going 'its too risky,get a real job", others will as I said use it as away to isolate themselves from the world. Others will go mad like Van-Gogh and from having no one to share his artwork with, go stark raving mad. And others....will just die of boredom. AND THOSE ARE THE WINNERS!!!!!! Imagine telling your new girlfriend that you have a passion. It requires "just" 4 or 5 hrs of your day. And when she asks how much money you've made with it, you sheepishly go...well, I had one good year but right now Im only down $47,000. But that's great cause I was down over 100!" Imagine what that looks like to people who dont get our passion.

In other places or parts of the world, word gets out you have a winning system and the whole town will try to use you and be your friend. Where is the happy medium. Is it either being scorned, bored to death or getting used? Or just missing out on being around real people.?I guarantee we couldnt even guess how many people died, got sick or had a heart attack while posting something on this board or any trading board because this is all they ever did. How many forex traders are in shape, go to the gym, are proud of their body, fit into clothes well. And brothers...you may not care now, but once you get into your 50's and you look in the mirror and go "Oh my God, where is my body" you will curse the day you ever traded..........................UNLESS YOU DONT LIKE WOMEN AND GETTING SMILES FROM THE OPPOSITE SEX. lol Fortunately for me Im an ex body builder so Im trying to get back into the gym. But why wasnt I doing it 15 yrs ago when I was in my prime? Because trading took over my life! I couldn't even find 1 hr a day to work out. But lay in the house and read "Market Wizards" for the 5th time, ,always time for that. I must admit, trading is almost like a successful life of crime. They say, anyone that could make a bundle as a thief or a criminal would make 10x that if they just went into business and did it legit. Is there not some similarity for traders. The price we pay to be winners, we could have 4 or 5 websites churning out money with no risk. Thats my BIGGEST regret. I wanted to be retired now and thought trading was the way. It may be for some, it may not be for most. Truthfully as an ex broker I can read between the lines of these posts and tell you this: Find me 3 people on this whole website that make a good living trading that they can live any way they want. Im talking 1/2 million a year or better.(and that aint much) Being profitable which is still 99-1 against you doesnt mean a thing if you cant quit your day job. Dont ever forget that!

Thanks for the support, Silat. I think this is a very interesting thread because it applies to so many things for so many people, and each person has a slightly different interpretation of things.

I'd like to respond to some of your points above, but I've got to unglue myself from this screen and make myself from dinner. LOL... can't even eat dinner at a normal time, oh man

But FF is filled with smart asses, so I know there are people here who make a good living. And to be honest, I think I've got a system that can beat them all, but I don't always follow it for the reasons I said above (mainly lack of discipline, which is also why I'm trying to automate the system now, I've got a beta version written).

I'd be happy to share my system with anyone who is interested, but you must be able to provide some additional value... or at least something.

In the meantime, Silat, I have sent you a PM and I hope to talk about this with you in more detail.

Keep the posts coming... I'm sure we all would like to hear your story (unless it's like No-Luck's worthless post).