I took my first step along the hard road of trading some 3 years ago now.
Like many others before me, I thought that I'd crack it in a year or so.
Like many others before me, I learned the hard and humbling truth that trading is anything but a quick route to fortune and glory.
A hundred dead ends followed a hundred 'systems'; indicators came and went with an almost dizzying speed; guru's were eagerly sought and their advice followed-but only their bank balances grew(at my expense).
As my skills grew, painfully slowly, I encountered the 'elephant in the room' that is capitalization. The withering disappointment of realizing that becoming a proficient trader was not going to be enough, and that you needed to become a proficient trader WITH a bundle of cash already in place to stand any chance, was a heavy blow.
But still, I persevered.
At each and every juncture, whenever the scale of the challenge seemed to grow larger, I stepped up to the plate by working and learning harder and harder and harder.
Each and every hard knock and dead end was met by a determined response of more work, longer hours, and increased determination.
I eulogized about reaping the rewards tomorrow from the efforts of today.
From originally trading through purely the London market hours, I continued on through New York.
From originally finishing on a Friday, I immersed myself in additional studies throughout the weekend.
And it came.
For the most part slowly, and, very occasionally in 'eureka' moments.
I realized one day that I could trade at breakeven or better consistently.
This drove me forwards even harder. I threw every waking moment into learning and practicing. I worked harder than I had ever done in my entire life. And I'm 48 years old.
Wading through a blizzard of 'systems' and 'methods', I started to realise that my 'Edge'(if that's what you call it) was not a result of any tricksy indicators or EA's, but rather was me, myself. I had, without realizing it, gradually changed my relationship with my charts, from being one where I looked for signals and triggers, to one where I, and this is still hard to explain, followed the flow, heard the song, perhaps even understood the story to some small degree.
3 years down the line, at long last, I now believe I have enough understanding and skill to stay alive in this business, and to support my family and myself.
Excepting one thing.
When I turned around, after 3 years of complete immersion in what I was doing, I discovered I no longer had a family.
4 weeks ago they left me.
My beautiful partner and my two gorgeous boys-gone.
Tired of a relationship with an obsessive who rarely ventured out of his study. Weary of the constant promises of a brighter tomorrow. Worried sick by the financial ramifications of no income for nearly 3 years.
Bored of a man who had seemingly forgotten what his priorities should have been.
Gone.
So, just remember people.
Life is what exists away from your screens.
The siren song of a brilliant life tomorrow will always seek to draw you back to your desk.
Learn from my mistake.
Look after those you love first.
Then trade with what's left.
Peace.
Like many others before me, I thought that I'd crack it in a year or so.
Like many others before me, I learned the hard and humbling truth that trading is anything but a quick route to fortune and glory.
A hundred dead ends followed a hundred 'systems'; indicators came and went with an almost dizzying speed; guru's were eagerly sought and their advice followed-but only their bank balances grew(at my expense).
As my skills grew, painfully slowly, I encountered the 'elephant in the room' that is capitalization. The withering disappointment of realizing that becoming a proficient trader was not going to be enough, and that you needed to become a proficient trader WITH a bundle of cash already in place to stand any chance, was a heavy blow.
But still, I persevered.
At each and every juncture, whenever the scale of the challenge seemed to grow larger, I stepped up to the plate by working and learning harder and harder and harder.
Each and every hard knock and dead end was met by a determined response of more work, longer hours, and increased determination.
I eulogized about reaping the rewards tomorrow from the efforts of today.
From originally trading through purely the London market hours, I continued on through New York.
From originally finishing on a Friday, I immersed myself in additional studies throughout the weekend.
And it came.
For the most part slowly, and, very occasionally in 'eureka' moments.
I realized one day that I could trade at breakeven or better consistently.
This drove me forwards even harder. I threw every waking moment into learning and practicing. I worked harder than I had ever done in my entire life. And I'm 48 years old.
Wading through a blizzard of 'systems' and 'methods', I started to realise that my 'Edge'(if that's what you call it) was not a result of any tricksy indicators or EA's, but rather was me, myself. I had, without realizing it, gradually changed my relationship with my charts, from being one where I looked for signals and triggers, to one where I, and this is still hard to explain, followed the flow, heard the song, perhaps even understood the story to some small degree.
3 years down the line, at long last, I now believe I have enough understanding and skill to stay alive in this business, and to support my family and myself.
Excepting one thing.
When I turned around, after 3 years of complete immersion in what I was doing, I discovered I no longer had a family.
4 weeks ago they left me.
My beautiful partner and my two gorgeous boys-gone.
Tired of a relationship with an obsessive who rarely ventured out of his study. Weary of the constant promises of a brighter tomorrow. Worried sick by the financial ramifications of no income for nearly 3 years.
Bored of a man who had seemingly forgotten what his priorities should have been.
Gone.
So, just remember people.
Life is what exists away from your screens.
The siren song of a brilliant life tomorrow will always seek to draw you back to your desk.
Learn from my mistake.
Look after those you love first.
Then trade with what's left.
Peace.
