Please help. I need someone to kick me in the ass. | Forex Factory

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Please help. I need someone to kick me in the ass.

  • #1
  • First Post: May 16, 2007 3:43am May 16, 2007 3:43am
So, i've been demoeing for almost 3 years by now. Mostly Oanda, and i think I am doing ok. I trade only interest-positive pairs, several at a time, and have usually enough leverage to withstand a 1000+ piploss on each and all of them . the thing is, I cant bring myself to open a real account. Not that I dont have the money or not being able to lose it, just cant make a decision. May be my depression is a reason why. Did anyone have a similar expierence?
  • #2
  • Edited 4:20am May 16, 2007 4:18am | Edited 4:20am
Usually I would advise to do what feels comfortable for you. Why dont you open a mini and use that as a knock around acct. It might help get you out of your funk (depression)? It costs the same as an hour w/ a shrink, and if you are good it might even pay you back.

Just an idea, it sounds like you may be ready for the next step but it is ultimately up to you.

ps, no I didnt have similar experience, I jump in guns blazing and almost lost my acct several times, but have learned from every loss.
  • #3
  • May 16, 2007 6:09am May 16, 2007 6:09am
Quoting Vlad
So, i've been demoeing for almost 3 years by now. Mostly Oanda, and i think I am doing ok. I trade only interest-positive pairs, several at a time, and have usually enough leverage to withstand a 1000+ piploss on each and all of them . the thing is, I cant bring myself to open a real account. Not that I dont have the money or not being able to lose it, just cant make a decision. May be my depression is a reason why. Did anyone have a similar expierence?
If you're doing OK after this length of time, I feel it's time to go for it.
But if you're worried about the mental side when using real money then take Dial's & Jim's advice.

  1. Stay with micro lots until you have mastered the mental side. There is a strong case for staying with micros even with $20K or more to play with. This lets you micro manage your money management to a much finer level (they call this granularity)
  2. Divide your trading pot into 3 or 4 tranches. Play 1/4 live until it's either doubled or disappeared. Top with the 2nd tranche, either to start again or increase position size if you're still making profits.
  3. At this point if you've lost the first tranche it may be prudent to look at what went wrong. Method or Mind?

As your account grows slowly you will, as your lot size grows, also gradually get used to the emotions that come with real money losses.
Starting slow with real money will also make you come to terms with trading as a career, and let you know whether it's for you or not. If not, you will still, hopefully, have some of the original money left to treat yourself to a decent meal, or something.

  • #4
  • May 16, 2007 6:14am May 16, 2007 6:14am
Quoting PeterFM
If you're doing OK after this length of time, I feel it's time to go for it.
But if you're worried about the mental side when using real money then take Dial's & Jim's advice.

  1. Stay with micro lots until you have mastered the mental side. There is a strong case for staying with micros even with $20K or more to play with. This lets you micro manage your money management to a much finer level (they call this granularity)
  2. Divide your trading pot into 3 or 4 tranches. Play 1/4 live until it's either doubled or disappeared. Top with the 2nd tranche, either to start again or increase position size if you're still making profits.
  3. At this point if you've lost the first tranche it may be prudent to look at what went wrong. Method or Mind?

As your account grows slowly you will, as your lot size grows, also gradually get used to the emotions that come with real money losses.
Starting slow with real money will also make you come to terms with trading as a career, and let you know whether it's for you or not. If not, you will still, hopefully, have some of the original money left to treat yourself to a decent meal, or something.

I strongly second that.... And consider yourself kicked.

Microlots brings you the emotional side of trading. You can laugh at a 1000 pips drawdown in the demo, but you're not going to sleep well with a 50 pips drawdown in microlots, even if it means a $2.00 loss.

But in the end of the day, if you had really gone bad, the loss is not going to hurt you badly.
  • #5
  • May 16, 2007 7:10am May 16, 2007 7:10am
There's something going on that you can't address by yourself. With all due respect for those who have answered you so far, no one here is going to help you overcome your reluctance to trade. I seriously doubt trading in micro-lots is the answer because if you've been demo trading for 3 years, you already know what's been said. You know what's available to you for tools. You're just not willing to take the tools and go to work.

I suspect you suffer from either a fear of failure or a fear of success. Same coin, different sides. If you truly want to trade, you're going to have do some work. You need someone to guide you. You could possibly do the work yourself, but you haven't yet, so why would you start now? Just because you've posted about it on FF isn't going to get you going right now. Something like Neurolinguistic programming - NLP, will do the trick...only if you fully commit yourself to doing it.

You're best bet is a professional that you can truly talk to and reveal to him what is really going on in your mind. Family and friends just don't cut it, so forget that route. If you're really serious about being a trader, then you'll do whatever is necessary. In this case, that means more than asking for figurative kick in the ass. You need a literal one from someone who knows how to do it properly.
  • #6
  • May 16, 2007 8:55am May 16, 2007 8:55am
when i begin trading, i lost it before i even notice what is wrong, and all of em just say "good for you" or "i told you so"

and then everything start to getting better, especially, that every one still waiting the time i fail for the second attempt....

that little pressure sure help my sense sharpened...
  • #7
  • May 16, 2007 9:53am May 16, 2007 9:53am
No One Can kick Your Ass for you......thats your job...we all had to do it for our selves and now its your turn....

Sorry to tell you but I think you just wasted 3 years of trading because demos mean nothing as they do not have the fear greed factor involved..

IF you want to trade then my advice is OPEN a REAL account TODAY...

I use interbankfx because they have micro lots.

I started trading with a 1 cent lot and believe me my heart was pounding out of my chest when I made that first real trade. It's amazing to think that I lost sleep and worried for hours over possibly losing 20 cents.....but you do...

.....and thats the big difference between a real account and a demo.....you now have something real to lose and something very real and potentially BIG to gain.....

But you have to kick your own ass... we are just here to support you...

Go for it........TODAY....and the best of luck to you.
It's All About Attitude ...
  • #8
  • May 17, 2007 3:46am May 17, 2007 3:46am
If you are depressed, go see a shrink before you engage yourself into trading real money.

Depression is a serious illness and you need to take care of it because it affects everything in your private life.

Forget about trading for a while, you need to take care of yourself first. Once you are fully recovered and mentally healthy, then trading will be a beautiful experience.

I strongly suggest you do not open any account, whether it is a micro or nano account.

Trading for the most part is a mental game, how can you stay competitive if your mind is sick?
  • #9
  • May 17, 2007 3:58am May 17, 2007 3:58am
get a ibfx or oanda account you can trade 1 cent pips and work your way up.

if you ahve been demoing for 3 years, you are going to have some bad habits and you arent going to improve til you use real money.

more then likely your fear is losing. its not about losing money, its about losing in general.
  • #10
  • May 17, 2007 9:48am May 17, 2007 9:48am
Quoting Vlad
May be my depression is a reason why. Did anyone have a similar expierence?
I have suffered from depression, but not since I've been trading.
When I was diagnosed my Doc prescribed something to take care of it and every aspect of my life changed for the better.
I'd address that first, because depression will influence all your decisions, trading and otherwise.
Other than that, sounds like your ready. By the way, sounds like you use excellent Money Management. Trading micros is a good way to hone that.
  • #11
  • Jul 22, 2007 11:54pm Jul 22, 2007 11:54pm
Ok , so finally I did open an account in the middle of June, and opened about 6 sub-accounts till the end of the month. Of course trading live is different, and pretty much all my systems and strategies went down to the drain as soon as I went live.
So, my current results are 277 trades with profit, around 20 are still in minus and 1 out of those 20 is pretty much hopeless. Am I doing ok? Or is it too early to say?
  • #12
  • Jul 23, 2007 12:32am Jul 23, 2007 12:32am
Quoting Vlad
Ok , so finally I did open an account in the middle of June, and opened about 6 sub-accounts till the end of the month. Of course trading live is different, and pretty much all my systems and strategies went down to the drain as soon as I went live.
So, my current results are 277 trades with profit, around 20 are still in minus and 1 out of those 20 is pretty much hopeless. Am I doing ok? Or is it too early to say?

How on earth do we know??

You might have 277 trades with 1 pip profit each = 277 pips profit.
And you might have 20 losing trades, 19 of which are only 5 pips each and 1 which is 169pips.. ??
  • #13
  • Jul 23, 2007 10:11am Jul 23, 2007 10:11am
I see your point. Well if I close the account now, I will be slightly positive - 5-7%. If I will wait a month without trading-- significantly more I think.
  • #14
  • Jul 23, 2007 10:14am Jul 23, 2007 10:14am
Quoting Vlad
If I will wait a month without trading-- significantly more I think.
...or less.

Quoting Vlad
1 out of those 20 is pretty much hopeless.
Why are you still in that trade then?
  • #15
  • Jul 23, 2007 11:56am Jul 23, 2007 11:56am
absolutely, but most likely it will be more. I keep the trade becouse it gives me some tiny interest, plus it might reverse with the next interest growth
  • #16
  • Jul 23, 2007 12:14pm Jul 23, 2007 12:14pm
Quoting Vlad
So, i've been demoeing for almost 3 years by now. Mostly Oanda, and i think I am doing ok. I trade only interest-positive pairs, several at a time, and have usually enough leverage to withstand a 1000+ piploss on each and all of them . the thing is, I cant bring myself to open a real account. Not that I dont have the money or not being able to lose it, just cant make a decision. May be my depression is a reason why. Did anyone have a similar expierence?
With All do respect.....

Not everyone is cut out to be a trader, no matter how desperately one wants to be a trader.....same as a pro ball player, we all can't be one, even if we dream of it......either you have it, or you don't.

If you can't "kick" yourself in the ass, than nobody can.......trading is not much of a team sport.

You may be well capitalized, as you state ( though for what size account was not addressed )....yet that is only one major part of being a trader.......sitting thru 1000 pip draw downs........on MULTIPLE PAIRS is.............unthinkable!
Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance
  • #17
  • Jul 23, 2007 12:19pm Jul 23, 2007 12:19pm
Quoting Vlad
absolutely, but most likely it will be more. I keep the trade becouse it gives me some tiny interest, plus it might reverse with the next interest growth
I mean if you want my honest opinion(and you don't have to count it for more then another internet guy chiming in, but you did ask), just based on this statement alone you are not "ok". I agree with the post above, you will know you're doing ok, when you can tell yourself you are doing ok. The tidbit of "results" you posted is so far from being able to gauge where you are at, but this statement tells me more about your trading then any numbers you throw out on wins and losses.

It sounds like you have a lot of work to do on the mental side of things. Please don't take this post the wrong way, as I am just answering your question you put out there from my opinion.



Best of luck
Mike
  • #18
  • Jul 23, 2007 12:37pm Jul 23, 2007 12:37pm
Quoting Vlad
Ok , so finally I did open an account in the middle of June, and opened about 6 sub-accounts till the end of the month. Of course trading live is different, and pretty much all my systems and strategies went down to the drain as soon as I went live.
So, my current results are 277 trades with profit, around 20 are still in minus and 1 out of those 20 is pretty much hopeless. Am I doing ok? Or is it too early to say?
One last thought as I re-reread a few more of your posts.......

If you have to ask the question at the end of this post, after 3 years of study and a "demo" account.........I'd say no to your question.

I am a notorious scalper/ day trader.....yet I've never taken 300 trades in a month's time..... though I scalp for more than 2-3 pips at a time.......still not sure what you are doing.

Anyway, my final thought, as you had asked for opinions........
Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance
  • #19
  • Jul 23, 2007 5:20pm Jul 23, 2007 5:20pm
Quoting mbqb11
The tidbit of "results" you posted is so far from being able to gauge where you are at, but this statement tells me more about your trading then any numbers you throw out on wins and losses.

It sounds like you have a lot of work to do on the mental side of things.

Best of luck
Mike
Probably, but why do you think your mentality of trading is better than mine? What are your results in forex , %-wise?
  • #20
  • Jul 23, 2007 5:28pm Jul 23, 2007 5:28pm
Quoting Vlad
Probably, but why do you think your mentality of trading is better than mine? What are your results in forex , %-wise?
this isn't about me I didn't ask for people to judge me, you did remember
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