What Fears are holding you back in life? | Forex Factory

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What Fears are holding you back in life?

  • #1
  • First Post: Jan 14, 2019 12:47pm Jan 14, 2019 12:47pm
Particularly,in your career as a trader...or/and in your life in general.Fears that hinder your performance and actually withhold you from being/becoming your best????
WHO KNOWS MAYBE WE COULD HELP YOU.
(The very same fear holding you back could actually be something that i/we went through and defeated in our lifes and trading journey's in here.)
  • #2
  • Jan 14, 2019 1:36pm Jan 14, 2019 1:36pm
Quoting EXpRINCE
Particularly,in your career as a trader...or/and in your life in general.Fears that hinder your performance and actually withhold you from being/becoming your best???? WHO KNOWS MAYBE WE COULD HELP YOU. (The very same fear holding you back could actually be something that i/we went through and defeated in our lifes and trading journey's in here.)
Obviously, there are many things that I am working on improving on. I think the biggest has to be with the fear of failing, which I am actively working on. I'm trying to fail fast and fail hard! (Not too hard because money is involved).
  • #3
  • Jan 14, 2019 3:25pm Jan 14, 2019 3:25pm
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  • #4
  • Edited Jan 15, 2019 10:01am Jan 14, 2019 3:49pm | Edited Jan 15, 2019 10:01am
Note: I am not advocating for anyone to do this... if you are not making any money yet, please for the love of God don't do what I did. My scenario is different from yours.

It was making the decision to trade "full-time". Maybe for the people who aren't successful at this yet, it's because they're treating this as a hobby... they think of trading as something they can just do for fun in their free time (you won't make any money with that type of thinking). I thought about it for a couple weeks before I decided to 'take the risk' of quitting my full-time student status and part-time job, so I could allocate all my time towards trading. I was already starting to profit, but I wanted to really maximize it... well, that would mean I'd have to give it my full attention. I had confidence so I dove straight into it.

So far it has been the best decision I have ever made in my life. Like I said, this may not be the best choice for others, but personally that's just one of the main few things that did it for me.

Like Sovereignty said above, it's the fear of failing that holds a lot of people back. If you have confidence and you know you can do it, then make that life changing leap!
  • #5
  • Jan 15, 2019 3:09am Jan 15, 2019 3:09am
The thought "what if i will never make it?"
i am trading for about a year now, and to be honest im making a great progress. I now have my own trading method and deep enough knowledge about trading theoretically.
Still, the thought sometimes creep in the back of my head, what if i fail at the end after i abandoned all the other paths that i could have choosen in my past.
now there is no way back and i am all wet deep in the water. my only option is to be profitable in the future or stop living.
cheers
Ask, and it is given. Every single time, no exceptions.
  • #6
  • Jan 15, 2019 3:24am Jan 15, 2019 3:24am
I fear simply losing money and what it brings.

Without money,I can not trade.
Without trade,I can not make living with trading.
Without income,then you know what will come next.
  • #7
  • Jan 15, 2019 7:08am Jan 15, 2019 7:08am
Quoting Sovereignty
{quote} Obviously, there are many things that I am working on improving on. I think the biggest has to be with the fear of failing, which I am actively working on. I'm trying to fail fast and fail hard! (Not too hard because money is involved).
Sovereignty...instead of focusing your mind,or indirectly letting your mind focus on FAILURE-train it to focus on creating wealth/success.There are many ways the mind can be taught or trained,just like with habits,this can be done with replacing a certain thought,in this case your fear of failure,with the hungriest thought to create success.Every time it slides in,cloud and conquer it with the wealth creation laser sharp focus!
  • #8
  • Jan 15, 2019 7:56am Jan 15, 2019 7:56am
Quoting Chart1st
Note: I am not advocating for anyone to do this... if you are not making any money yet, please for the love of God, don't do what I did. My scenario is different from yours. For me, it was making the decision to trade "full-time". Maybe for the people who aren't successful at this yet, it's because they're treating this as a hobby... they think of trading as something they can just do for fun in their free time (you won't make any money with that type of thinking). I thought about it for a couple weeks before I decided to 'take the risk' of quitting...
Chart1st...i couldn't agree more....i meet a lot of people and i have met a lot of people in my 10+ years of my trading career who will tell me, "ohh i want this soo bad,when they hear or see me crushing it!"...and i always laugh quietly somewhere in the deep of my heart,because i know if i were seriously to challenge them to committ and take the first step-NONE OF THEM would,the world is actually full of Retreaters...If it wasn't,then we would have more of us who are successful,or have created wealth out there than there arn't(depending on how you define your success).

I like the part where you actually took a risk of quitting two things at the same time.Wow,much respect.
My wife always tells me i am waisting my time coming into forums like this,that i can't change the whole world or advice it all,but its because of stories and people like you that i come and in forums like this.(It don't matter what level of their careers they are at.)...You always find damn inspiring stories and damn inspring people.

That you did is actually the true meaning/definition of WHAT IT ACTUALLY/TRULY MEANS TO TAKE A RISK TO BE ABLE TO CREATE/ACHIEVE YOUR SUCCESS...most people want to be assured that they will succeed,a.k.a when they quit their jobs and their other careers e.t.c,and the very fears that serve will forever keep them in the same place they were in 2014,15,16,17&18...Also more importantly why 80% of New Year resolutions don't work and continue to not work for them.
Trust me working,having worked with a lot of people or students.You meet such characters each and every year.in varying forms.

People take giant leaps like you did out there,quit their commitments,take crazy risks and start companies with their savings e.t.c,and only to later hit achieve or build empires.Sylvester Stallone close to homeless,sold sold his dog for 50usd in desperate need of cash,in his starting days of his career,wrote a script of Rocky and a week later sold the script and bought his dog back for 3k usd,the movie went on to hit 225 million USD earnings!!!

Some people want assurances and security that this will actually work out for them,in any risk they take that is!!..and they later proclaim "YES WE WANT SUCCESS SO BAD"...And looking at it from an accomplished mindset or a successful mindset you actually never stop being amazed!!
  • #9
  • Jan 15, 2019 8:39am Jan 15, 2019 8:39am
Quoting beefStew
The thought "what if i will never make it?" i am trading for about a year now, and to be honest im making a great progress. I now have my own trading method and deep enough knowledge about trading theoretically. Still, the thought sometimes creep in the back of my head, what if i fail at the end after i abandoned all the other paths that i could have choosen in my past. now there is no way back and i am all wet deep in the water. my only option is to be profitable in the future or stop living. cheers

Beefstew...very deep...deep words indeed...let me tell you something Sir.
Did you know it actually takes equal if not more energy to play it safe as it does to create success,(massive success being the exception)...so look at it this way buddy or ask yourself this questions if the thoughts ever creep in.

-Would i rather be living my life using the same amounts of energy playing it safe aka living a mediocre life and probably being there/staying for ever.
OR
-Would i actually be willing to take A RISK using the very same amounts of energy devoting my life to creating success???
I think the answer is obvious to most,if not few.

like Gordon Gecko said it,"You know kid,when choosing between two evils,i like to go for the one i haven't tried before..."

There is no better feeling than working hard and actually later enjoying your efforts and witnessing your empires stand right before_especially coming from nothing!!...and this is a feeling that many people will actually never get to experience.
  • #10
  • Jan 15, 2019 8:51am Jan 15, 2019 8:51am
Quoting john0415
I fear simply losing money and what it brings. Without money,I can not trade. Without trade,I can not make living with trading. Without income,then you know what will come next.

John0415...Ever thought what would happen if your never lost money?and what never loosing it would bring???
Feel the fears-and do what it is you fear anyways.

Make a habit of forming a daily list of all the things you fear in your daily life(and i'm not talking about actual life threatening fears like jumping off a cliff without a parachute e.t.c). That won't be facing your fears,that would actually be dying or testing Gentle Man Death himself!!
-Everyday go out there and do all of them and come back and tell me if there is ever a more satisfying feeling that what you will have felt.

Repeat it daily and see what happens to your life and growth.

e.g you fear loosing money.lets assume you have an already working trading strategy-journal...make it a habit to take just a single trade without a STOP-LOSS AND WITHOUT a TAKE PROFIT,then watch the trade from start to finish and actually see what happens to you???As long as you have a working strategy that you are currently using.
  • #11
  • Jan 15, 2019 11:28am Jan 15, 2019 11:28am
Quoting EXpRINCE
{quote} Beefstew...very deep...deep words indeed...let me tell you something Sir. Did you know it actually takes equal if not more energy to play it safe as it does to create success,(massive success being the exception)...so look at it this way buddy or ask yourself this questions if the thoughts ever creep in. -Would i rather be living my life using the same amounts of energy playing it safe aka living a mediocre life and probably being there/staying for ever. OR -Would i actually be willing to take A RISK using the very same amounts of energy...
Yeah what you just said is exactly why i choose to trade.
If i choose to be satisfied with my 9-5 job, the next time i blink i will have been 65 years old, retired, thinking about what could have been, then die, so i thought i will take this trading career to make my life more meaningful, i got nothing to lose.
I still have a long ass way to go, though.

Thanks for the question. It made me stopped for a while and rethink all i have been through. Good luck to you and everyone reading this.

Cheers.
Ask, and it is given. Every single time, no exceptions.
  • #12
  • Jan 15, 2019 8:16pm Jan 15, 2019 8:16pm
Quoting EXpRINCE
{quote} John0415...Ever thought what would happen if your never lost money?and what never loosing it would bring??? Feel the fears-and do what it is you fear anyways. Make a habit of forming a daily list of all the things you fear in your daily life(and i'm not talking about actual life threatening fears like jumping off a cliff without a parachute e.t.c). That won't be facing your fears,that would actually be dying or testing Gentle Man Death himself!! -Everyday go out there and do all of them and come back and tell me if there is ever a more satisfying...
Dear EXpRINCE,

I just have to thank you for that tip of writing down a daily list of fears and facing them, already started.

Can you please comment on taking a risk to change and then failing? Where do we draw the line between taking risks and recklessness or stupidity?

I recently took a risk to upscale my trading efforts, committed almost all funds saved over the years as a student and failed. Failed to properly manage risk of a recent flash-crash and was wiped out...~450+ pip gap up on the open of Gold/Aussie and ~45k gone from margin call close out. Damn scared to even write about it or to disclose details here, facing the fear now.

Kind Regards,
Tzamo
"Work hard, put in the effort, and follow your dreams..." -Me
  • #13
  • Edited 6:38pm Jan 16, 2019 5:42pm | Edited 6:38pm
Quoting EXpRINCE
{quote} Chart1st...i couldn't agree more....i meet a lot of people and i have met a lot of people in my 10+ years of my trading career who will tell me, "ohh i want this soo bad,when they hear or see me crushing it!"...and i always laugh quietly somewhere in the deep of my heart,because i know if i were seriously to challenge them to committ and take the first step-NONE OF THEM would,the world is actually full of Retreaters...If it wasn't,then we would have more of us who are successful,or have created wealth out there than there arn't(depending...
I know what you mean, I’ve had a few family and friends ask me for advice. I wanted the learning curve to be shorter for them, so I gave them all the information they needed to know in order to profit... and not a single person took advantage of what I shared with them. Nobody was willing to really commit. It was just something they were temporarily attracted to. A friend told me, "help the ones that you can, and forget the ones that don't want it."

People just don't want it enough. They realize how hard it actually is, so they back out before they even dip their toes into the water. When you said that the world is full of retreaters, getting into trading has made me realize that truth. Everybody wants to make money, but they want it fed to them on a plate... not how it works. The ones who are genuinely interested and are hungry to learn, will somehow find you and ask real questions.

I used to think that talking on forums was a waste of time too. But I realize that there are very successful people out there on forums such as FF and they're just lurking... "successful traders don't hang out on forums" is a myth. Why wouldn't we? We have no one to really talk about trading in our day-to-day life so we need an outlet and a community of people we can talk to. I don't post all that much on FF but I won't ever forget about this place. I came up from here, I found my future through this forum and this market.

Taking a risk could be as simple as making a change to your life. I realized that I didn't want to live a normal lifestyle like everybody else, so I made a decision to change something up. All I know is you need to have some balls in order to risk what's comfortable to you (sense of security, 9-5 job, etc. etc.), to achieve something greater. Otherwise your life will just become static. This sounds very cliche and corny, but you are ultimately in charge of where your life is headed through the choices you make. The people who take risks often end up more successful, because they see opportunity.

Also, remember to ignore the ones who claim this is impossible... that's just their ignorance and insecurity speaking. They have no idea.

Cheers.
  • #14
  • Jan 16, 2019 8:03pm Jan 16, 2019 8:03pm
Quoting Chart1st
{quote} I know what you mean, I’ve had a few family and friends ask me for advice. I wanted the learning curve to be shorter for them, so I gave them all the information they needed to know in order to profit... and not a single person took advantage of what I shared with them. Nobody was willing to really commit. It was just something they were temporarily attracted to. A friend told me, "help the ones that you can, and forget the ones that don't want it." People just don't want it enough. They realize how hard it actually is, so they back out...
Great post, Im a massive fan of persistence, I believe you can achieve almost anything if your willing to put in the work and when you do you can almost be assured that the reward can be much greater than what you first envisioned. The experienced gained from the work involved from conquering one goal strengthens you to achieve other goals of much larger proportions and the only way to truly understand this though is to work through the obstacles, but most people see this as too arduous and then mentally label them as failures making the next dream seem much more distant than the first

Both Zen and trading taught me to question my thinking and only by doing this can you begin to see reality clearer than before, but also it reflects how the masses think, how it affects their lives and why most people only exist and never really live
life is a reflection of what we allow ourselves to see
  • #15
  • Jan 16, 2019 8:07pm Jan 16, 2019 8:07pm
Quoting john0415
I fear simply losing money and what it brings. Without money,I can not trade. Without trade,I can not make living with trading. Without income,then you know what will come next.
Everybody starts here at some point, no one goes through life without pain or doubt, working backwards from your goal in detail can assist you in creating confidence and making a decision to believe in yourself. Put your plan into action
life is a reflection of what we allow ourselves to see
  • #16
  • Last Post: Edited Jan 17, 2019 9:21am Jan 16, 2019 8:58pm | Edited Jan 17, 2019 9:21am
Quoting mikeeating
{quote} Great post, Im a massive fan of persistence, I believe you can achieve almost anything if your willing to put in the work and when you do you can almost be assured that the reward can be much greater than what you first envisioned. The experienced gained from the work involved from conquering one goal strengthens you to achieve other goals of much larger proportions and the only way to truly understand this though is to work through the obstacles, but most people see this as too arduous and then mentally label them as failures making the...
I agree. Like you said, the only way to truly understand is to work through the obstacles. How can you expect to be good at something without first-hand experience? I think from being able to trade, my mindset has transformed entirely. It feels as if you can take on anything, all it requires is breaking down the problems into bite-sized chunks until you thoroughly understand each individual issue. Then, you move onto the next problem. All those small problems gradually form into the big picture... then one day everything becomes clearer.

Like you said above, trading taught me that nothing can happen unless you put your plan into action. This not only applies for trading but with anything in life. Nothing will change unless you come up with a plan and make it happen yourself.

"... most people only exist and never really live." Yes, exactly. I thought there has to be way more to life than conforming to a 9-5 like everybody else. There had to be another way out.
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