Wow, you guys have been busy over here.
You guys wanna know what happened? I’ll tell you… the whole damn story. Then you can judge how you will…
As some of you know, I dedicated my book to a girl named Kimberly. She was everything to me and she was soooo damn amazing. But Kimberly has a problem. 12 years ago her and her friend went to a nightclub, got trashed, and when the club shut down the bouncers dumped her and her friend in her car. At some point Kim came to and tried to drive home. Never made it. She blacked out on an off-ramp, drove off the edge, flipped the car and killed her friend.
She was charged with DUI Manslaughter and sentenced to 3 years in prison, 2 years house arrest, 10 years probation, and they took her license away… forever.
I met her about a year into her house arrest. I hired her to work in a call center I was building at the time and we hit it off quite well.
Fast forward 5 years and our relationship was a mess. I loved her dearly, but she wasn’t well. I don’t know if its unresolved issues over her friend’s death, or just my insecurities, but I can’t help but feel like she doesn’t really want to be with me.
Unfortunately, given her situation, I’m her only option.
I have a good life. I work from home, I make my own schedule, and I make good money. The only job she can get is working for my friends company, but I really want her to work with me in my biz.
That was how our relationship began after all…
Problem was, she has zero interest in markets, finance, or trading. And her complete lack of interest in something that is so important to me leaves me feeling worthless.
So I start drinking… heavily.
For about a year I’m getting wrecked every night of the week. And we begin fighting on the regular.
In the summer of 2014 I had finally had enough.
For Christmas 2013 she gave me a set of 6 Waterford Crystal rocks glasses and a crystal decanter for my scotch. Which just so happened to be shortly after I told her I was concerned that I was becoming an alcoholic…
Anyway, I saw the glasses as a symbol of how little she actually cared about me, so when I finally had enough, I just started shattering them on the kitchen floor. Then I told her to leave.
For the first time in a while I felt like I was in control of my life. I dramatically cut down how much I was drinking and started socializing with better people.
It was around about this time that I met Jordan Belfort and wound up taking his straight line persuasion program. Which was awesome… and led to the ultimate trader program.
Say what you will but I put my heart and soul into that thing, and I still believe that it’s the single best thing I’ve ever done in my life. But it was expensive. It included a demo account from Interactive Brokers with real time futures data for all for exchanges, and an eikon terminal, for each student who attended. And I had to pay Jupa a sales commission to sell it for me because I had to.. you know.. run the actual program.
Of that $2500 price tag, about $600 of it dropped to me as profit. And I had to take on all the operational risk of supporting all those platforms whether we sold seats or not. So for those who think I was just raking it in, think again.
That having been said, yeah, I pulled down $50k in training revenue over about 30 days, and I was pretty pleased with myself for learning how to actually sell, but there was one little detail that nobody but my best friends know; WHY I was able to do it.
One of the key things I learned in the Straight Line program was that you need to know your why. Why are you doing this? Cuz if all you want is the money, you’re gonna crash and burn. You need a really good why to plow through the hard things in life.
When I thought about my why, the one thing I kept coming back to was Kimberly.
Again, maybe it was insecurity, but I started thinking about all the terrible shit I had done when I was drinking, and I started feeling really guilty.
See Kimberly wanted certain things. Six years into our relationship we still weren’t married. And with both of us in our mid 30’s, she was starting to really want a baby. But as a trader and half assed educator, my income was never stable enough.
That’s what the ultimate trader was all about. Instead of trading dick jokes with nubcake in chat, I decided that I was going to put serious effort into training people. I do have the skill and there is plenty of demand, so why not?
Anyway, after moving $50k in product, I contacted her, apologized, and made a series of commitments. I would quit drinking (or at least get it back to a responsible level), move to a place where she could be independent (another huge problem related to her inability to drive), marry her, and give her a baby.
There were other things too, but those were the big ones.
In exchange I wanted her to be nice to me. Take an interest in the things that mattered to me, and start working on her own issues.
To make a long story short, we agree to try.
Unfortunately, shes reluctant to move back to the place we were living… too many bad memories she says. OK, fair enough. I agreed to move someplace where she could be independent. So I commit to a $2100/mo apartment in downtown Tampa starting December 1.
It’s perfect… but she can’t move in. Hillsborough county department of corrections changed their policy about supervised persons leaving the state and she wanted to visit her family in Alaska for Christmas. So it’ll have to be after the first of the year.
Ohh.. and she would be going to Alaska alone. For two weeks.. which turned into 16 days.. and she was a complete bitch about it.
Sitting in my beautiful apartment that I moved into for her while she treats me like shit really started to hurt. So I hit up erosguide and ordered a call-girl. Which was a fucken disaster… but that’s a whole different story.
I felt really guilty after… and I was still hurt that she was still being so damn mean, so I grabbed our dogs and went on a road trip to New Orleans for Christmas. Which is another good story, but not relevant at present.
After the new year she came back and moved into the new place.
Ultimate trader was going well, we were in our beautiful place, and I was delivering on everything I promised. But she wasn’t any nicer. If anything, she was even nastier then she had been before the breakup.
Then market volatility collapsed, and trades were few and far between… I started worrying that people weren’t getting value out of the program.
It was about this time that Effy and his girlfriend moved down from Detroit. We had been working on some longer term trading stuff and that was going well. So we started moving in that direction.
I promised Kimberly stability, and for better or worse, launching a fund seemed like a good next step.
What nobody really understands is that starting a fund is no joke. To do it right is fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucken hard. You need lots of resources and there is no way to do it on your own. I needed Kimberly to step up and help me deliver on this life she said she wanted.
Long story short, she didn’t. And I started to implode.
I’d taken on all this responsibility for her, and as it turns out, she wasn’t willing to give anything back. So in late July I was done.
I had quit drinking, moved to this place, changed more aspects of myself then I care to admit, and it still wasn’t getting me what I needed. If anything, I was even worse off than when I was drinking… cuz at least when I was drinking I could ignore how she made me feel.
I stood in my office for a full 5 minutes thinking about the consequences, but I eventually decided that I couldn’t do it anymore. So I walked into her office, told her I cheated on her, with hookers, she was a bitch, I was done, and she needed to get the fuck out… then I left.
When I came back several hours later, she was still there. She apologized… and started being really nice.
Like REALLY nice! She became the person I expected her to be.
When I asked her why, she said that when I blew up at her I said something that made her realize how badly she had been treating me.. and didn’t want to be that person anymore.
Cool! Life is good… so I plow myself into building the fund.
It lasted about a month.
On September 2nd, she goes off to a probation appointment. Thanks to Jonl we had discovered Uber, and she was able to move around freely on her own.
Before she left, she told me she loved me, kissed me, and as she walked out the door causally said “Your completely oblivious to everything going on around you, aren’t you?”
I was killing myself trying to make all this shit work, so I said “yeah, I’m trying to do all this!”
She never came back… vanished.
All her shit was still here, and my first thought was that she was abducted by the Uber driver.
Hey, it happens.
No… in a state of panic I call everyone we know before finally piecing together that she had skipped out.
Ohh, and she had gone around telling all my friends and family that she had to do it this way because I wouldn’t let her leave. Conscripted them all into helping her screw me.
At some point Effy lured me out of the apartment for lunch, and someone came and took a good bit of her crap. She still has keys to my car, my apartment, my mailbox, and now she wants me to give her money for a new apartment.
It’s all just fucken ridiculous.
Sooo… while you’re all bitching about how much of a scammer I am and how I screwed everyone because I shut the site down for a month… my life has been falling apart.
Now I don’t even know if I want to get out of bed in the morning. But I do. And I’m really doing a lot of soul searching.
I like helping people learn how to trade. I like financial markets. And despite what the few random pikers here have to say about it, I’m actually pretty good at both.
But honestly, after reading the last few pages of this thread, I don’t know that most of you are worth the effort.
In all seriousness… fuck you guys. And thanks for nothing.
You guys wanna know what happened? I’ll tell you… the whole damn story. Then you can judge how you will…
As some of you know, I dedicated my book to a girl named Kimberly. She was everything to me and she was soooo damn amazing. But Kimberly has a problem. 12 years ago her and her friend went to a nightclub, got trashed, and when the club shut down the bouncers dumped her and her friend in her car. At some point Kim came to and tried to drive home. Never made it. She blacked out on an off-ramp, drove off the edge, flipped the car and killed her friend.
She was charged with DUI Manslaughter and sentenced to 3 years in prison, 2 years house arrest, 10 years probation, and they took her license away… forever.
I met her about a year into her house arrest. I hired her to work in a call center I was building at the time and we hit it off quite well.
Fast forward 5 years and our relationship was a mess. I loved her dearly, but she wasn’t well. I don’t know if its unresolved issues over her friend’s death, or just my insecurities, but I can’t help but feel like she doesn’t really want to be with me.
Unfortunately, given her situation, I’m her only option.
I have a good life. I work from home, I make my own schedule, and I make good money. The only job she can get is working for my friends company, but I really want her to work with me in my biz.
That was how our relationship began after all…
Problem was, she has zero interest in markets, finance, or trading. And her complete lack of interest in something that is so important to me leaves me feeling worthless.
So I start drinking… heavily.
For about a year I’m getting wrecked every night of the week. And we begin fighting on the regular.
In the summer of 2014 I had finally had enough.
For Christmas 2013 she gave me a set of 6 Waterford Crystal rocks glasses and a crystal decanter for my scotch. Which just so happened to be shortly after I told her I was concerned that I was becoming an alcoholic…
Anyway, I saw the glasses as a symbol of how little she actually cared about me, so when I finally had enough, I just started shattering them on the kitchen floor. Then I told her to leave.
For the first time in a while I felt like I was in control of my life. I dramatically cut down how much I was drinking and started socializing with better people.
It was around about this time that I met Jordan Belfort and wound up taking his straight line persuasion program. Which was awesome… and led to the ultimate trader program.
Say what you will but I put my heart and soul into that thing, and I still believe that it’s the single best thing I’ve ever done in my life. But it was expensive. It included a demo account from Interactive Brokers with real time futures data for all for exchanges, and an eikon terminal, for each student who attended. And I had to pay Jupa a sales commission to sell it for me because I had to.. you know.. run the actual program.
Of that $2500 price tag, about $600 of it dropped to me as profit. And I had to take on all the operational risk of supporting all those platforms whether we sold seats or not. So for those who think I was just raking it in, think again.
That having been said, yeah, I pulled down $50k in training revenue over about 30 days, and I was pretty pleased with myself for learning how to actually sell, but there was one little detail that nobody but my best friends know; WHY I was able to do it.
One of the key things I learned in the Straight Line program was that you need to know your why. Why are you doing this? Cuz if all you want is the money, you’re gonna crash and burn. You need a really good why to plow through the hard things in life.
When I thought about my why, the one thing I kept coming back to was Kimberly.
Again, maybe it was insecurity, but I started thinking about all the terrible shit I had done when I was drinking, and I started feeling really guilty.
See Kimberly wanted certain things. Six years into our relationship we still weren’t married. And with both of us in our mid 30’s, she was starting to really want a baby. But as a trader and half assed educator, my income was never stable enough.
That’s what the ultimate trader was all about. Instead of trading dick jokes with nubcake in chat, I decided that I was going to put serious effort into training people. I do have the skill and there is plenty of demand, so why not?
Anyway, after moving $50k in product, I contacted her, apologized, and made a series of commitments. I would quit drinking (or at least get it back to a responsible level), move to a place where she could be independent (another huge problem related to her inability to drive), marry her, and give her a baby.
There were other things too, but those were the big ones.
In exchange I wanted her to be nice to me. Take an interest in the things that mattered to me, and start working on her own issues.
To make a long story short, we agree to try.
Unfortunately, shes reluctant to move back to the place we were living… too many bad memories she says. OK, fair enough. I agreed to move someplace where she could be independent. So I commit to a $2100/mo apartment in downtown Tampa starting December 1.
It’s perfect… but she can’t move in. Hillsborough county department of corrections changed their policy about supervised persons leaving the state and she wanted to visit her family in Alaska for Christmas. So it’ll have to be after the first of the year.
Ohh.. and she would be going to Alaska alone. For two weeks.. which turned into 16 days.. and she was a complete bitch about it.
Sitting in my beautiful apartment that I moved into for her while she treats me like shit really started to hurt. So I hit up erosguide and ordered a call-girl. Which was a fucken disaster… but that’s a whole different story.
I felt really guilty after… and I was still hurt that she was still being so damn mean, so I grabbed our dogs and went on a road trip to New Orleans for Christmas. Which is another good story, but not relevant at present.
After the new year she came back and moved into the new place.
Ultimate trader was going well, we were in our beautiful place, and I was delivering on everything I promised. But she wasn’t any nicer. If anything, she was even nastier then she had been before the breakup.
Then market volatility collapsed, and trades were few and far between… I started worrying that people weren’t getting value out of the program.
It was about this time that Effy and his girlfriend moved down from Detroit. We had been working on some longer term trading stuff and that was going well. So we started moving in that direction.
I promised Kimberly stability, and for better or worse, launching a fund seemed like a good next step.
What nobody really understands is that starting a fund is no joke. To do it right is fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucken hard. You need lots of resources and there is no way to do it on your own. I needed Kimberly to step up and help me deliver on this life she said she wanted.
Long story short, she didn’t. And I started to implode.
I’d taken on all this responsibility for her, and as it turns out, she wasn’t willing to give anything back. So in late July I was done.
I had quit drinking, moved to this place, changed more aspects of myself then I care to admit, and it still wasn’t getting me what I needed. If anything, I was even worse off than when I was drinking… cuz at least when I was drinking I could ignore how she made me feel.
I stood in my office for a full 5 minutes thinking about the consequences, but I eventually decided that I couldn’t do it anymore. So I walked into her office, told her I cheated on her, with hookers, she was a bitch, I was done, and she needed to get the fuck out… then I left.
When I came back several hours later, she was still there. She apologized… and started being really nice.
Like REALLY nice! She became the person I expected her to be.
When I asked her why, she said that when I blew up at her I said something that made her realize how badly she had been treating me.. and didn’t want to be that person anymore.
Cool! Life is good… so I plow myself into building the fund.
It lasted about a month.
On September 2nd, she goes off to a probation appointment. Thanks to Jonl we had discovered Uber, and she was able to move around freely on her own.
Before she left, she told me she loved me, kissed me, and as she walked out the door causally said “Your completely oblivious to everything going on around you, aren’t you?”
I was killing myself trying to make all this shit work, so I said “yeah, I’m trying to do all this!”
She never came back… vanished.
All her shit was still here, and my first thought was that she was abducted by the Uber driver.
Hey, it happens.
No… in a state of panic I call everyone we know before finally piecing together that she had skipped out.
Ohh, and she had gone around telling all my friends and family that she had to do it this way because I wouldn’t let her leave. Conscripted them all into helping her screw me.
At some point Effy lured me out of the apartment for lunch, and someone came and took a good bit of her crap. She still has keys to my car, my apartment, my mailbox, and now she wants me to give her money for a new apartment.
It’s all just fucken ridiculous.
Sooo… while you’re all bitching about how much of a scammer I am and how I screwed everyone because I shut the site down for a month… my life has been falling apart.
Now I don’t even know if I want to get out of bed in the morning. But I do. And I’m really doing a lot of soul searching.
I like helping people learn how to trade. I like financial markets. And despite what the few random pikers here have to say about it, I’m actually pretty good at both.
But honestly, after reading the last few pages of this thread, I don’t know that most of you are worth the effort.
In all seriousness… fuck you guys. And thanks for nothing.